Everyone has dreams and aspirations. Mine are to sit on my ass until I become the size of Jabba the Hutt and need a skiff to transport my awesome girth. Unfortunately that dream doesn’t pay the bills. So sometimes I dream of being a professional hockey player but then I remember that I am 31 years old, haven’t played competitively in over two years and have blown out my knee three times. Other times I dream of being a rock star but then remember that my musical talent is minimal at best (I can make noise come out of my instruments) and I sound like a dying cat. I do however have a passion for something that I have been told by people other than my mother that I have some natural ability in, that of course is writing.
Over the last few months I have started chasing after the dream of being a professional writer more seriously and aside from sending out resumes and cover letters I am attempting to put together an online portfolio of my collected published writings. When I talk of these writings I do not refer to the work I have posted on my personal blogs (like this one you are reading now) but rather sites that have requested and/or recruited my work for their sites. Some of my material is long gone, in the early 2000s I wrote film and music reviews for a site called the Soap Box which is no longer in existence, along with links to my published work. However a good portion of my writing is still out there on servers around the globe and I am working on compiling them for use in this portfolio.
Embarking on this is certainly an interesting endeavor from a personal standpoint. As you can imagine, it is weird to look back and actually see your writing style (and skill) evolve over time. Sadly a lot of what I wrote for the first site I am combing has been corrupted from various site changes and content management adjustments over the four years since my first work appeared on their site. I have however been able to salvage a small handful of critical reviews (if you want to call them that) for use in my portfolio.
But it would not be fair for me to just smugly tell you about these old pieces and then not allow you to read them, so have at it:
I also managed to dig up a couple other pieces that I find fairly funny from a retrospective point of view.
Damn Commies Strike Again – I hold a long standing belief that the state of New Jersey is a communist state and the actions described in this helped make my case.
Joel Siegel is a Dick – A piece where I call Joel Siegel a disgrace to film critics in something of a fanboy rant.
Hopefully, those of you that read my work regularly, can see the evolution from these pieces to how I write now. (God, I hope they can see a difference)
Another piece, my 300th published article on the Philadelphia Metblogs, that I am not going to share with you directly, still rings true for me in a lot of ways. In that piece I presented a top ten reasons for writing there. This post tonight, is nothing special but I present you with my nine reasons I write.
9. From my couch I can mock the Eagles. I hate them so.
8. From the same couch I can cover the Flyers.
7. I get to debate stuff in a large forum with people, because it is fun to argue even if I do not agree with the point I am making. I like to be able to voice my opinion even when I am so obviously wrong.
6. I do it for the chicks. No, seriously.
5. OK, I lied about the number six because I am not getting any chicks from writing this stuff but if I was single I’m sure I could.
4. I’m able to increase the readership of my lame movie reviews.
3. I’m able to increase my readership of any of my rambling for that matter.
2. I get to hang out in the most diverse arena in the world (the internet) with some pretty cool people outside of my normal circle of friends and sometimes drink while doing it.
1. I do it for me. Because I love it.